Yesterday, I did something I have never done before…

I turned down a part in a play.

Another group in town is doing “The Secret Garden” again, and I absolutely love that show. I haven’t been on stage since 2001 (and I haven’t auditioned for anything since last time I did “The Secret Garden”), so I’m a little rusty. Having children has made my voice a little higher, so I decided to try for Lily, the lead female, knowing full well that I don’t have the breath support to sing that high because being a soprano is so new to me.

When I filled out the form, I indicated that I would only accept Martha or Lily

If I had auditioned with an alto piece, I would have gotten a callback, but I didn’t. I sang one of Lily’s songs and shook like a leaf the entire time — totally terrified even though I knew everyone on the casting committee. I did the dance fine, but didn’t get invited to callbacks, which were last night. Jerry’s boss also tried out, and he was surprised I didn’t get a callback, but I wasn’t: as I said to him, I’m not strong enough for Lily and I’m too old to play Martha now.

Last night, after callbacks were over, I got a phone call from the director, asking me to be one of the chorus parts. She said, “I know you said just Martha or Lily, but I’d love to see you back onstage again, and this would get you in the swing of things again. Your voice is so good — just underused.”

I turned her down, saying that because I tutor at night, it would be too much of a financial burden to shift my schedule for rehearsals, especially right before final exams. I’d do it for a big part, but I couldn’t justify it for a small one — I’d lose about $200 in income a week.

Not to mention I’m scheduled for surgery on May 21, and I’d have to move that, too.

And the rehearsal schedule is BRUTAL — Monday, Tuesday, Thursday nights and all day every Saturday. Yeah. Jerry would so love THAT.

Took me a long time to calm down to go to sleep last night, even though I was exhausted from Paducah Day (which was awesome — I’ll talk more about that later)… I went to bed early, but probably didn’t go to sleep until just before I normally go to sleep anyway. It really bothers me to have turned down a part, even though I absolutely know without a doubt that it was The Right Thing To Do.

Sometimes responsibilities suck, you know?

One thought on “Yesterday, I did something I have never done before…”

  1. I agree…it would have been awesome seeing you back on stage. You are an incredible actress! But, I do agree with you that it was right to turn down the part in the chorus. I know it was a very difficult decision for you, as I know how you love the show, and love performing. Yeah, responsibilities do suck…which is why I’m retired. Bummer.

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