Reason #412 why Elaine would make a lousy Southern Baptist

Jerry and I went to a funeral yesterday for the mother of a dear friend. While the friend isn’t particularly religious, the mother was, so the clergy was a Southern Baptist preacher.

It was all smiles and praising, and while he was smiling and praising he started talking about the second coming. My conscious brain shut completely off at that point and I started making a grocery list in my head. Jerry needs new shampoo, we’re out of mayonnaise, I really need to get some more bread, and I think the girls are out of apple juice. I came back to reality for a moment, and he was still talking about the Rapture so I wandered off to think about quilts for a while…

I much prefer the casual approach of the Episcopal church when it comes to this stuff. I don’t think I could sit in church every Sunday and listen to the idea that we’re just waiting and waiting and waiting until the second coming, and how nothing else matters.